Are Your Worried About Companies Tracking You & Stealing Your Data?

You are? Congratulations ))

Your ancestors worried about disease or being eaten by wild animals. You don't know how good you have it!

So... the privacy policy... this is like way out on the edge of nowhere. It's the edge of reason... where words are so carefully chosen for clarity that they make no sense whatsoever...  What on earth ARE you doing here man? 

The only time I ever read a privacy policy was when I was trying to figure out how to write a privacy policy. And I suspect nobody ever reads a privacy policy for any other reason.

But okay... let me try to explain in plain English how handles your data so you can sleep at night again.

Privacy Policy

Last updated: July 11, 2018

Okay listen up. Don't use this website if you don't agree with this page. If you use the site you are "agreeing". Although only a lawyer would actually think so.

If you think you're crazy... nobody believes in more imaginary things than lawyers! They are totally bonkers people!

Information Collection And Use

Personal Data

Here we go...

On this website you can sign up to the newsletter. If you sign up I will collect:

  • Your email address
  • Your name

You probably already knew that though didn't you.

Website Usage Data

I also collect information about how is accessed and used.

This Usage Data may include information such as your computer's Internet Protocol address, browser type, browser version, the pages of the website that you visit, the time and date of your visit, the time spent on those pages, unique device identifiers and other diagnostic data.

It's totally spooky. If someone visits a page on this site I magically know everything about them. Including their favorite breakfast cereal.

Actually don't panic.

I don't know the names of particular visitors. Unless you click on a link from an email I sent you. Then I could maybe figure it out, but to be honest I've never tried.

Newsletter software can collect data about who opens and reads the emails that are sent. And it also can track who clicks on links contained in the email, but if MailChimp has such a feature I don't currently use it.

From Google Analytics I only see, for example, a visitor from New York, used the Chrome browser, looked at pages x, y and z.

I don't know your favorite breakfast cereal, but hey if you are reading this and want to share then please let me know.

Tracking & Cookies Data

Website visitor tracking works by using cookies.

A cookie is a little file that is placed on your computer when you visit a website. If you return we know it's you because we see you've still got the same cookie that we gave you and we can't understand why you didn't eat it yet.

But I don't know your name or anything like that just because you looked at the website.

If you want, you can instruct your browser to refuse all cookies or to tell you when a cookie is being sent. However, if you do not accept cookies, you may not be able to use some portions of

Examples of Cookies we might use:

  • Session Cookies. We use Session Cookies to operate the site.
  • Preference Cookies. We use Preference Cookies to remember your preferences and various settings.
  • Security Cookies. We use Security Cookies for security purposes.
  • Chocolate Chip Cookies. These don't affect your privacy but we use them because they are tasty. And when I say "we" I mean ME because they are all mine!

Use of Data uses the collected data for various purposes:

  • To provide and maintain the website
  • To provide analysis or valuable information so that we can improve the site
  • I might use your email address to email you. You didn't see that one coming now did you!
  • To monitor the usage of the site
  • To detect, prevent and address technical issues
  • I'm basically just sitting all day looking at all this data trying to figure out who you are and what favorite breakfast cereal is but I can't do it.

Transfer Of Data

Your information, including Personal Data, may be transferred to computers located outside of your state, province, country or other governmental jurisdiction where the data protection laws may differ than those from your jurisdiction.

If you add your name to a mailing list. That list might be stored anywhere in the world. will take all steps reasonably necessary to ensure that your data is treated securely and in accordance with this Privacy Policy and no transfer of your Personal Data will take place to an organization or a country unless there are adequate controls in place including the security of your data and other personal information.

Even that one time... when North Korea wanted to buy my email list so that Kim Jong-un could spam you with his cover version of Elton John's Rocket Man. I totally refused because it would have been unethical. That's just the kind of guy I am.

I will never sell your name or email address to anyone. And I won't give it away for free either. Mum's the word. My lips are sealed.

I might email you but if you want you can unsubscribe at any time.

And if you don't like the emails I certainly DO encourage you to unsubscribe.

Disclosure Of Data

Legal Requirements may disclose your Personal Data in the good faith belief that such action is necessary to:

  • To comply with a legal obligation
  • To protect and defend the rights or property of
  • To prevent or investigate possible wrongdoing in connection with the website
  • To protect the personal safety of users of the site or the public
  • To protect against legal liability

Security Of Data

The security of your data is important to us, but remember that no method of transmission over the Internet, or method of electronic storage is 100% secure. While we strive to use commercially acceptable means to protect your Personal Data, we cannot guarantee its absolute security.

Service Providers uses third party companies and individuals to help us run the site.

These third parties have access to your Personal Data only to perform these tasks on our behalf and are obligated not to disclose or use it for any other purpose.


We may use third-party Service Providers to monitor and analyze the use of our Service.

  • Google Analytics
    Google Analytics is a web analytics service offered by Google that tracks and reports website traffic. Google uses the data collected to track and monitor the use of our Service. This data is shared with other Google services. Google may use the collected data to contextualize and personalize the ads of its own advertising network.
    You can opt-out of having made your activity on the Service available to Google Analytics by installing the Google Analytics opt-out browser add-on. The add-on prevents the Google Analytics JavaScript (ga.js, analytics.js, and dc.js) from sharing information with Google Analytics about visits activity.
    For more information on the privacy practices of Google, please visit the Google Privacy & Terms web page:

Links To Other Sites

This website contains links to other sites that are not operated by us. If you click on a third party link, you will be directed to that third party's site.

We have no control over and assume no responsibility for the content, privacy policies or practices of any third party sites or services.

This is a Privacy Policy for and not the entire internet.

Contact Us

If you have any questions about this Privacy Policy, please contact me by: